Below is the sixth submission to the Community Forum for Survivors submitted anonymously on 10/5/2018.We appreciate the trust this survivor, and all survivors, place in us by sharing their stories. Note: MCRCC does not allow comments on blog posts.

Submitted by Alysia

Survivor’s gender identity: Female

The survivor’s age at the time sexual violence was perpetrated against them: 18

The survivor's age now: 28

The survivor’s description of sexual violence perpetrated against them:

"This is hard to put in words as I haven’t done so before. I’ve spoken about it with my therapist and spouse but here goes. I was violently raped when I was 18. I was strangled until I lost consciousness. My face felt like it going to explode, starting with my lips. I felt the unbearable pain of the tearing and rips, but could not speak or manage to scream. When I woke, my face had popped blood vessels everywhere and my neck was imprinted with his hands. When I got the courage to call the cops 2 weeks later, the cops questioned him and nothing happened. Follow up questions from the police were for me and I felt like they thought I was lying. The community that knew him, attacked me and I felt like the village crazy woman. So many people called me a liar, and said there was no way that someone as kind as him would do such a thing. I lost a lot of friends. It was a small town and everyone seemed to know and said I made the whole thing up. I got harassed by a lot of men who knew him. My own mother said it was my fault for putting myself in that situation. I lived with this for 9 years before seeking counseling last year."

If you or someone you care about has been sexually assaulted and is looking for resources or support, MCRCC provides a confidential helpline available 24/7 at (831) 375-4357. We support survivors today and always.